i have decided that taking a break from packing to read my new magazines is not cheating. after all, if i don't read them, i'll have to pack them. so i'm actually doing a good thing. right? will NEVER be packed!
i'm going to bore everyone with lots of blah blah blah about my packing because I'm figuring out a lot as i go. i'm going through the memories, saying hello to some and goodbye to others. it's not an efficient way to box up your life, but it's my way.
i'm trying to consolidate, which is actually kind of fun. i've decided not to pack my many many bathing suits, my perfumes, my bandannas, my hats, my sunglasses, my slippers, my shoes, etc etc...so i'm boxing all of them..
ahh, the life.
anyways, i was set to type something fun but suddenly i'm in a reflective mood again..the past month has been filled with saying goodbyes which i have yet to master after having done several times.
some of them seem easy; goodbye to this room which pretty much looks like a store with all of the stuff i've gathered thru the years i've cocooned in it..goodbye to it's oversized windows that over looks nothing worth seeing. as i look around now i see my home, the place i've disappeared inside to shelter me thru the storms, both of weather and life.
some of them inconsequential; goodbye to this bed and the pillows which have been witnesses to my most intimate moments during my stay here..
some of them easier at the time; goodbye to the friends who have made my stay here worthwhile. we went out last night and said our goodbyes..and after they drove away with the laughters and hugs we shared, i was left with tears i didn't know would fall.
some of them better left unspoken; goodbye to my family, my nieces and nephews, my nanny.. who are doing all they can to make me stay, making everything so difficult for me now.. making me feel like leaving is a crime.
one in particular is in my mind, and i'm not sure i'm ready to face it; goodbye to this chapter of my life, to this person i have been here in pi. i can no longer be her, but i will carry her with me to cali. her strength--my strength will see me through this journey.
sigh
i'm going to bore everyone with lots of blah blah blah about my packing because I'm figuring out a lot as i go. i'm going through the memories, saying hello to some and goodbye to others. it's not an efficient way to box up your life, but it's my way.
i'm trying to consolidate, which is actually kind of fun. i've decided not to pack my many many bathing suits, my perfumes, my bandannas, my hats, my sunglasses, my slippers, my shoes, etc etc...so i'm boxing all of them..
ahh, the life.
anyways, i was set to type something fun but suddenly i'm in a reflective mood again..the past month has been filled with saying goodbyes which i have yet to master after having done several times.
some of them seem easy; goodbye to this room which pretty much looks like a store with all of the stuff i've gathered thru the years i've cocooned in it..goodbye to it's oversized windows that over looks nothing worth seeing. as i look around now i see my home, the place i've disappeared inside to shelter me thru the storms, both of weather and life.
some of them inconsequential; goodbye to this bed and the pillows which have been witnesses to my most intimate moments during my stay here..
some of them easier at the time; goodbye to the friends who have made my stay here worthwhile. we went out last night and said our goodbyes..and after they drove away with the laughters and hugs we shared, i was left with tears i didn't know would fall.
some of them better left unspoken; goodbye to my family, my nieces and nephews, my nanny.. who are doing all they can to make me stay, making everything so difficult for me now.. making me feel like leaving is a crime.
one in particular is in my mind, and i'm not sure i'm ready to face it; goodbye to this chapter of my life, to this person i have been here in pi. i can no longer be her, but i will carry her with me to cali. her strength--my strength will see me through this journey.
sigh
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